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  “Sure. I haven’t eaten yet today so maybe we can go for food.” I offer and everyone nods in agreement.

  As we stand, I feel a tap on my shoulder.

  “Hey, Emilia. I’m not sure if you remember me. I was wondering if you’d like to dance. Just one song?” Noah offers me a smile and I look at the girls who have already sat back down to wait for me.

  “Um, sure. Thank you, Noah.” I answer and he smiles at his name.

  “You do remember.” His blue eyes light up as he holds out his hand and I take it, allowing him to lead me to the dance floor.

  As we make our way through the couples swaying slowly to the music, I catch Sean out of the corner of my eye. Standing still with his group, his eyes are locked on me and I feel a cold shiver shoot up my spine.

  “It looks like you are celebrating.” I start and Noah looks at me to continue so I tilt my head in the direction of his group.

  “Oh, it’s a farewell for one of our team members. They’re moving on from Connor Realty.” His answer surprises me.

  “You work there, too?”

  “I was hired on with Joshua right out of high school. I manage a team under him.” He answers and suddenly I feel out of place.

  Noah always seemed laid back. He was nice to me but he works with Sean and his friends and he works right under Joshua. Come Monday, I won’t be able to trust any of these guys.

  My only ally at Connor Realty is Rosalyn.

  The music dies down and I step back to say thanks when his arms tighten around me a little.

  “How about one more dance?” He smiles down at me and I feel confusion set in so he keeps talking. “Look, Sean is drunk and he looks like he’s either going to ask you to dance or harass you again and I don’t want a fight to break out in the bar.”

  I blurt out a giggle at his suggestion that I could even handle myself in a fight.

  “I’m not going to fight him.” I answer back, realizing this is the first time I’ve smiled in about 20 minutes.

  “I’m not talking about you, Sweets. I’m talking about Joshua.”

  9

  Emilia

  Shit, shit, shit, shit.

  As Noah says Joshua's name I stop dancing and look up to meet his stare but he’s not looking at me.

  My heart slowly tightens as I follow Noah's eyes past our table and toward the entrance to the bar.

  Standing still at the front door and staring right at me, Joshua’s entire body is the only thing I see and I instantly feel a pinch of guilt and a pull in his direction.

  “You asked me to dance to keep me here? For him?” I look at Noah who has slowed his steps but kept his arms wrapped around me.

  “I think you owe it to yourself to give this year a chance, Emilia.” The serious expression on his face carries a hint of kindness and I huff out a half laugh at his words.

  I’m being treated like a child from all sides now.

  “He told you?” I ask incredulously. How many people at my dad’s work know I’m there under Joshua’s authority for the year.

  Without thought, I let out a resigned breath of air in Noah’s arms and he begins to speak as though he’s read my thoughts.

  “Joshua is my closest friend and I work alongside him now. I’m the only one he confided in. No one else knows about your situation. It’s not what you think. He would never…”

  I don’t have the patience for anyone else telling me what is best for me tonight.

  “It’s exactly what I think it is.” Cutting him off I attempt to step back but he spins us in a half circle and doubles down in his grip.

  “Trust me, Emilia. There are hills worth dying on. This is not one of them. Make this easy on yourself and leave with Joshua.” He lowers his voice and continues. “You know he won’t offer you any other option, right?” He lets his words linger between us and I feel my fight drain out of me.

  Noah is right. I can leave quietly with Joshua, or I can cause one of many scenes and all of them will end with me leaving with Joshua. I’ve had too many drinks and I’m wobbly on my feet. Come Monday, the rumor of my drunken rampage will be going around work before I even start my shift and I don’t want this version of me to be the one everyone is talking about. I won’t do that to my father.

  There’s something primal laced in among Noah’s words. I feel like property. Like I’m being collected and for a brief moment, I feel at peace with the sensation which is starting to worry me.

  Sucking in a deep breath I release my grip on Noah’s arms and sigh out a reluctant, “Fine.”

  Looking in Joshua’s direction, Noah nods once, then loosens his hold around me and thanks me for the dance as he leads me back to my friends.

  Before they stand, I flash them a big smile and stifle our plans. “Hey, guys. I need to get going. I’m suddenly really tired from the day. Here.” Fishing the last bills out of my pocket and dropping them on the table, I grab my jacket and purse and continue, “Appies are on me this time. Thanks for having me out. Let’s do this again, okay?”

  “Well at least stay for the food. You said you haven’t eaten since yesterday.” Rosie states watching me curiously as I feel someone step in behind me.

  “Yesterday? You told me you ate earlier today.” Joshua’s deep voice sinks into me as his breath tickles along my neck.

  “Oh, I got confused. It’s been a long day.” I answer feebly as I turn to look at Joshua and I feel my nerves tingle under my skin.

  He knows I’m lying. I feel it in his intense stare. He sent at least 20 texts and I chose not to answer a single one. Suddenly I feel sorry. I’ve disappointed him. I shouldn’t feel like this. I should feel thrilled I was able to get under his skin once more, but I don’t and I want to be alone in my room, away from his harsh gaze.

  Looking back at my friends, Vicky and Marta have already begun to look over the food menu but Rosie is sitting still watching Joshua and I, and I offer her a little shrug.

  “I’ll see you in the office on Monday then?” I smile at Rosie and offer her a wave as I turn and lead the way to the door.

  He had never planned on staying. His car is parked in front of the entrance. He only came to collect me.

  Without another word Joshua opens the passenger door for me; and as I settle into my seat, he slams it shut beside me, rattling my nerves.

  I attempt a deep breath as he rounds the front of his sports car and settles into the driver’s seat and starts the engine.

  Pulling the car onto the road, he leaves me to sit on my own. After a few minutes I feel my defiance rise in me and I refuse to let him control the situation through silence.

  “I was just out with friends.” I start and he continues to drive like there is no one else in the car with him. I feel my face heat with anger. “I didn’t do anything wrong.” More silence. My impatience is beginning to claw away at my composure and I hear my own voice getting louder with my next words. “I don’t deserve any of this.”

  Joshua slams on the breaks at my declaration and I feel the seat belt burn a strip against my skin as my body lurches forward.

  Quickly glancing around, I notice we are alone on the back road leading to my dad’s home and, as I meet Joshua’s intense stare, I begin to realize it would have been better to enjoy the silence on the drive back.

  “You don’t deserve this? Ha. That’s the funniest thing I’ve heard all day.” He starts and I feel the blood drain out of my head as he continues. “Poor Emilia never does anything wrong. Let me ask you something. Did you understand you were not to leave the house tonight?” He pauses, leaving his question lingering for an answer.

  “I… you never told me I couldn’t.”

  “Was it implied? Was it understood, you were not to leave the house, Emilia? Answer the question.” He demands and waits again, his eyes fixed on mine.

  “I…” I consider lying, but we both know I would be and I don’t want to make this worse. “Yes. I understood I was not to leave the house. But I’m not a -”

>   “And at some point before I arrived at the bar, did you see my messages and choose not to respond to them?” He asks his second question and I realize how this looks from his point of view.

  “Yes, I...”

  “And did you blatantly lie to me today when you told me you ate earlier?” He asks his third question just as fast and I suddenly feel like I’m beginning to sink under the weight of my mistakes.

  Resigned, I answer. “Yes. I lied, but-”

  “But nothing, Emilia. You’ve taken every chance you could today to defy me. Your father’s last wishes are all written down in that will and you are taking every opportunity to disappoint him again.”

  As he bites out his words, my stomach knots and I suddenly feel nauseous. He’s bringing my memory of my father into this and I can’t handle his accusations.

  “You know what? I don’t need this shit.” As I bite out my last word, his expression doubles down and I don’t have it in me to fight about my dad. Pulling the handle on the door I open it and whip off my seat belt before he can lock me in. “I’ll walk the rest of the way back.”

  The evening hits me and I’m thankful for the fresh air as I take a couple of wobbly steps forward. Before I can make it away from the car, a strong grip on my arm spins me and I’m face to face with Joshua. His eyes are bright and I step back to give myself some space.

  A small scent of his cologne hits me and his proximity to me is becoming too much. All of this contact today is piling on and I just need to breathe.

  Without warning, I feel my body move. First to the car as my thighs press up against the side, then I’m bent over the hood as he shifts my jacket up my back.

  “What are you doing?” I squeal out as I try to right myself and his hand over my back holds me in place.

  “What I should have done this afternoon, Emilia. Remember, your choices brought this on you.” His voice sounds eerily calm as I struggle under his weight.

  Nothing happens and I stop squirming and try to look over my shoulder at him when I feel a sharp pain on my ass through my jeans and my stomach lurches at the sensation.

  “Wh… what are you doing?” I yell my same question again. And try to push off but his hand only holds me down. “You can’t-”

  My panic is cut short as a second smack hits harder than the first and I push my entire body forward into the car as though it’ll give way for me, but it doesn’t.

  “Oh, I can and I will, Emilia. You’re lucky you are still wearing your pants.” My heart thuds into my chest at his threat.

  As I feel his hand pull back, I panic. Lying across the hood and looking horizontally down the road, the scenery begins to spin.

  “S-stop.” I choke out and I realize I’ve started crying. I’ve never cried in front of Joshua. I would never let him see me down, but my tears are out for the third time today and I breathe deep trying to stop them. “Please, stop.”

  Short gasps begin to take over my breathing and I feel my body begin to tense in panic.

  “Take a deep breath, Emilia.” Joshua’s hand comes down but there is no contact. Instead he rests it on the curve of my bottom and I obey and suck in as much air as I can.

  “Good.” I feel elated at his pleasure with me then instantly confused by my reaction. Why do I care if he’s happy with me? I don’t have time to consider my own question when he continues. “Emilia, you have a choice. You can make this year as easy or as difficult as you wish. You lied to me when I asked you a question, you left the house when you knew you shouldn’t and you didn’t answer my texts. I won’t tolerate any disobedience. You have the chance to settle this between us right now.” As his words register, I’m met with conflicting feelings. I worked so hard to get away from everything here and I’m living the worst possible version of my life right now. In the back of my mind I feel a small comfort and I don’t know why as he continues, “You’re punishment for lying to me and not answering my messages is this.” As he speaks, he moves his hand along my ass as I wait for him to finish.

  Then he asks me a question I never in my life thought I would hear from him.

  “Do you accept your punishment, Emilia?”

  10

  Joshua

  When I woke up this morning I never thought I’d be standing on the side of the road tonight with Emilia bent over the hood of my car.

  For more than an hour after I found out she was gone, I left message after message and as the minutes ticked away, I felt panic begin to build in me. I was worried about Emilia.

  What is happening to me?

  If it wasn’t for Noah’s text telling me he saw Emilia at The Hole, I’d still be looking for her.

  Since the moment she walked through my office door today she’s done nothing but fight me. I know I shouldn’t have made the comment about her disappointing her father in the car, but I need to push back as much as I’m being pushed.

  If we’re going to begin to move forward, she needs to confront her anger about this situation and there’s only one way I know to get her talking and it’s by jabbing at her buttons until she snaps and here we are and there is only one question left to ask.

  I’m no longer running on anger. Seeing her safe in the bar with Noah calmed my ire and all that remained is her initial defiance that must be atoned for.

  Once I hit the right words with her, she punched back and I was ready for her. Jumping out of the car, I could tell by her sluggish movements, her senses are dulled and she’s had some drinks.

  She moved easily across the hood of my car and I’m momentarily grateful Noah was at the club tonight as an image of someone else taking advantage of Emilia in this state sparks my protective side.

  Running on instinct, I lifted her jacket and pulled my hand back. My desire to clear our slate overrode my restraint.

  Her body jolted to life at my first spank, lighting me up from the inside out.

  She can’t hide how she responds to my control and I am guessing that beneath her anger and her shame at being spanked, lies a woman who, deep down, wants to balance the scales between us.

  And now here we are.

  I maintain a connection with her as I rest my palm on her bottom and hold her to my car as I begin to tell her about her punishment.

  Then I pause to take a deep breath and ask the question I need to ask to confirm both her consent and my suspicions.

  “Do you accept your punishment, Emilia?”

  The chill of the evening air settles on me as I wait for her to consider my words and I watch her body move as she takes her breaths, pleased that she is listening to my instruction to breathe deeply.

  I allow a full minute of silence to go by, then I move my palm along the curve of her ass and I hear her clear her throat.

  “I…”, my body feels heavy with anticipation. I know what she wants to say but I can tell by her hesitation, she is afraid to say it. I won’t move until she makes a decision one way or the other.

  “Yes.” Her words are barely above a whisper as she sinks her body onto the hood of my car and I allow her a few more seconds to sit with her answer before I begin.

  “You can tell me to stop if you need but I strongly urge you to experience this, Emilia.” Again, a silence lingers between us and she nods her head in a hesitant understanding.

  In appreciation for her honesty and her bravery in accepting this, from me no less, I offer her some information I probably wouldn’t have shared.

  “When I couldn’t find you I began to worry, Emilia. We’ve always stood on the opposite sides of our history together and I hope this year will change things for you. I truly hope you will grow into the woman your father thought you were. I intend to be here fully for you and I ask the same for you. There are consequences for disobedience.”

  Lifting my hand back, I hear her suck in a sob as I bring my hand down on her butt once more. This isn’t something I want to draw out right now. Every part of me wants to get this over with as much as she does so we can move on with balanced scales. br />
  I deliver two more swift smacks when I hear her speak into my car.

  “I’m sorry.” Emilia gasps as she speaks and I think her apology has shocked her more than it has me right now.

  It is done. Releasing my hand from her back, I step off to the side, allowing her to stand.

  Slowly she raises herself off the hood, leaving a small trail of tears sparkling in the glow from the street light.

  The silence between us caries so much emotion. This is a side of Emilia I’ve never seen before but if I’m being honest, she’s also never seen this side of me— almost no one has.

  Frozen in her place, she continues to stare at me, unsure of herself. Her hair is messy and wet from her tears and her makeup is smeared across her delicate features as her lower lip trembles.

  At once she sucks in a deep breath of air and it’s now I notice she looks a little more pale than she did before.

  “Emilia?” I whisper softly trying to get her to do something so I can act accordingly.

  “Ummm… I’mmm… I think I’m gonna be sick.” She doubles over the side of the road and takes two deep breaths before she vomits all over the pavement.

  My instincts take over and I move to her side pulling her hair back and wrapping my arm around her waist.

  Her body heaves and my heart hurts for her. I can’t say I wouldn’t be in the same spot if the tables were reversed. If I was given this many restrictions in one day I would be testing my boundaries and pushing back, too.

  The only difference is, I don’t think I would have been strong enough to acknowledge my defiance and accept my punishment. As the thought hits me, I feel a little admiration for Emilia creep in.

  She’s hurt and she’s alone right now. She has no family left and her closest friends here haven’t seen her in years. She has no one here and the one person she doesn’t want in her life above all is the one holding her hair out of her face as she vomits.

  I don’t want this to be a foreshadowing of the year ahead. There is something about Emilia that draws me to her. As much as she fights me, I feel a connection to her and it is something I need to explore.